Solid Little Rock Jams

Paul McCartney - Tug Of War

John Lennon was dead, George Harrison's career had become a joke, and Ringo was entertaining black children all across Africa as the conductor of Shining Time Station. Enter 1982, the setting of Paul's new solo record. Understandably, the guy took a year off to deal with the grief of the grisly murder of his favorite Rottweiler, but unfortunately didn't spend that year off working on this album because it's a step down from McFartney II.

Well, not really. McFartney II was Weezer's Make Believe of 1980. A fun, hilarious album that while, compositionally and lyrically, might be lacking, but certainly not lacking in the sheer enjoyment you get out of listening to it. McFartney II works because no one who actually bought it was expecting a real album, they just wanted to hear Paul wave his dick all over the place and secrete a couple great classics like "Temporary Secretary."

Tug Of War is the exact opposite of that effort, Paul decided to get professional and hire crusty old George Martin, who was already 600 years old at this time. I think it's a dull, predictable choice, and while it may have given him some cred, I don't think it paid off. This doesn't sound like a Beatles album, just another 1980s pop record. but a good 1980s pop record. Paul tries a bit of everything here like he did on the last record, but you can tell George was there to spank Paul badly on his cute little british buttocks whenever he started to get too weird. Everything here is tight, firm, and full o' hooks. The first half of the record doesn't do too much for me, it's the second half that really shines. "Ballroom Dancing," a simple song about a couple fighting or something and then dancing in a ballroom and going to bed smelling each others feces is a great song. I really like it.

Why does he sing with all these black people for this album and the next one? Is Paul trying to get in touch with his inner negro? the McCartney/Wonder songs just make me fucking LOL in their ridiculousness and they aged terribly. Still, the 1-2-3 punch of "Ballroom Dancing," "The Pound is Sinking," (Paul's take on a collapsing economy, it's fun, cute, classic Paul) and "Wanderlust" might be the best 3 piece suite of his solo career up to this point. Still an overrated work, but respectable, and thouroughly enjoyable.

Man, there are like no dick jokes in this review, I actually have to get to class soon so I sort of dashed this off in a few minutes.

Rating: Paul releases the biggest pussy-munching album of his career thus far. Oh, right! I should mention the obligatory Lennon tribute song "Here Today," all the beatles did one of these(except Ringo, but Lennon still owed Ringo a big mac so Gringo hates Lenin with a fiery passion because without Big Macs Gringo's penis starts to swell until it explodes because Gringo is a robot that is fueled by meat and cheese, Gringo Starr hasn't had a dick since the early 1980s, which is why his career has had the least success because with no penis to jerk off for release, Ringo is pretty much angry all the time).

"Here Today" is touching, not exactly tear-jerking, and maybe a bit underwhelming considering if anyone had something to say about the dude, it was Paul. It's pleasant, but don't let it be the reason for you to pick this up, you'd be disappointed.

Song: "Ballroom Dancing"