Solid Little Rock Jams

Paul McCartney & Wings - Band On The Run

After the relative disappointment of Red Rose Speedway and Wild Life, and yeah, I say relative because it's fucking Paul McCartney, dude could fart out a melody better than some of the shit he tossed onto those last two albums. I doubt any critic was going to give him the time of day. Really, who could blame them though? John Lennon was releasing albums like Hey Check Out The Sounds I Can Make By Flapping My Buttcheeks Together To Make Words and Sounds and George Harrison releasing his ultra hit triple album Cloud Nine. Critics knew the real tasty shit was coming out of the other little buggers. The thing is, well, they're completely wrong. Paul hadn't released a bad album yet, per se. They were just a bunch of tossed up little goofy Paul McCartney songs. They're going to be fun to listen to, definitely nothing objectionable in the least, but at the same time, who the fuck wants to listen to 40-45 minutes of Paul McFuckinFartney singin "ooh I love you" pretty much over and over again? Paul needed some more variety in his releases, one of the great things about The Beatles is that they covered virtually every piece of songwriting territory out there as well as forging ahead on new ones. Paul had either forgotten about this or was so busy sniffing his hot wife's hairy stinky pussy to give three or four shits.

Paul, due to his rampant stinky pussy eatin', seemed to be content released silly faggot rocker or pussy shit ballad. Ram was a great album and certainly was of Beatles-tier in terms of quality, and while I wouldn't specifically call it diverse, it could easily be argued it was the strongest set of songs he ever released. Band On The Run, on the other hand, is all up diverse in this motherfucker right here. All these songs cover different territory. Sure, Paul was still really into some sort of weird prog fetish at the time, but I think it worked out for the best. The songs, while maybe not as strong in substance as Ram, certainly work, but in a different way. Band On The Run is just classic after classic, fuck the introspective bullshit. This is just a pure pop album and is the king shit of all fuck pop albums.

Fuck Ram, Band On The Run is my jam! Nah, just kidding. but seriously my jewish friends. Band On The Run isn't just the best Paul McCartney album, it's also one of the greatest albums of all-time. Period. I'd put this above any Beatles album besides The White Album and maybe Rubber Soul, and certainly I'd put it way the fuck over all those shitty Lennon albums and could take down All Things Must Pass without breaking a sweat and still eat Sentimental Journey's shit for breakfast.

Curious as it is, while this isn't as nearly as personal of an album as Ram, it strangely has perhaps some of the best lyrics Paul ever penned in his music career. These songs don't really make any sense or whatever, but they're certainly coherant, and from a dude who's first solo release had songs that go "lalalalal" and "that would be something" over and over until I tuck my scrotum in my ass, it's certainly an accomplishment.

Problems with this album? Nah. Filler tracks? Nope, no filler on a Paul McCartney album. I know, it's strange isn't it? It's kind of weird how Paul was able to pull a album of this caliber out of his shithole in 1974, but at the same time it's like, shit. There's absolutely no excuse why every Wings album don't sound like this. It's fucking Paul McCartney! Guy wrote "Yesterday," "For No One," "Michelle," and "You Won't See Me" all within a fuckin year of each other. Get out of town, asshole. All you can give me is two bona-fide classic albums in the 70s and then a bunch of relatively enjoyable dick shit records? Fuck you, sir!

Rating: Simply the best, do yourself a favor, ignore Paul's rep as a fluffy little poo poo, and remember that this dude was in the fuckin' Beatles and just pick up this goddamn album. Goddammit, everyone should own this. Also, one last thing. This is easily the fullest album he had recorded up to this point. His first two were solo efforts, and the second two were Wings albums, but whatever. The production on this one actually sounds like a real band like Foo Fighters recorded this because Foo Fighters are awesome. Lush, heavenly, masterful, just Paul. Love you, man.

Song: Nineteen Hundred and Eighty Five - Fucking menacing piano pop!